Fan Review

STRANGER
(Words and Music by Rick Springfield and Mark Spiro)

Look at me baby
Tell me what you see
Am I the one you love
Or am I your enemy
You can turn your head
I can wash my hands
But I've got to know where I stand

'Cause sometimes I feel like a stranger in my house
And I wonder who's lying with me
I'm seeing ghosts walking round in the hallways
And they look like we used to be
When I look in the mirror I see
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house

We built this house of love
It was safe inside these walls
But if love isn't living here
This house will surely fall
We've got to scream
We've got to fight
Do anything to make it all right

'Cause sometimes I feel like a stranger in my house
And I wonder who's lying with me
I'm seeing ghosts walking round in the hallways
And they look like we used to be
When I look in the mirror I see
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house

We can scream it
Got to work it out
And find the book of love
We can shout it
Got to open up and shed a little blood
It's raining on the outside
But the house has sprung a leak
I can take it, you can hit me
I can turn the other cheek
Got to do anything we got to do
Baby look at where we've been
We can build it up
We can tear it down
But we've got to start again

Sometimes I feel like a stranger in my house
And I wonder who's lying with me
I'm seeing ghosts walking round in the hallways
And they look like we used to be

Sometimes I feel like a stranger in my house
And I swear if you'd just look at me
Then all those ghosts walking around the hallways
Will be something that used to be

When I look in the mirror I see
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house
A stranger in my house

(total playing time 4:17)

Song Facts: This can be found on Sahara Snow.

More Reviews:

I've always liked this song.  I  was struck on the first listen to how similar it was to Stranger in the House on Tao, but I admit I like this version better.  That song seems angrier in vibe and tone than this one.  This one seems more positive I think in "we'll work it out, we can work it out, we'll do whatever it takes, look at where we've been, if we can overcome that, we can overcome anything" tone rather than the "Oh my goodness, what's wrong with us, why are we so distant?"  Kind of like when you are in a long term relationship and you think, "This can't be right, it's supposed to be PERFECT if we're meant to be together..." until you realize that every couple goes through this to some extent.   It's clear they both describe the same type of thing (perhaps, even, the same relationship) but from a different place. 

I don't want to be mundane and state the obvious, this is definitely Stranger in the House revisited.  I liked it on Tao and I like this one even better.  The opening verse, melts me every time.  The wording and especially the voice.  It sets the mood for the whole song.  It is so common for us to be meanest to the people we love, as Rob Thomas said (my second favorite song writer of all time) - I'm sorry about the attitude I need to give when I'm with you, but no one else will take this shit from me.  So I totally understand the thought "hey, am I your friend or your enemy because it's a little cloudy for me right now".

This updated version of Stranger seems to be a little softer than the Tao version, and where in Tao, it seemed to be both their faults, here it seems to be more her who has changed and is the "stranger", even though he says he sees a stranger in the mirror, everything else seems to point to her.  I actually thought the Tao version was really personal, down to the vision of him smelling her clothes, that conjures up much more of a visual then anything said here.  But, the earlier one was Stranger in *the* House, where this line is Stranger in *My* house.  I find that very interesting.

One other part that stands out for me is:
I can take it, you can hit me
I can turn the other cheek
That seems to be another theme that pops up now and then, the female getting a little physical.

I can identify with the song a little.  When he writes one called "Stranger in My Life", then he'll really have hit the jackpot for me.

Look at me baby
Tell me what you see
Am I the one you love
Or am I your enemy

Who hasn't looked at their spouse (or significant other) and wondered this very thing?  Anyone who has been in a long relationship can certainly relate to the emotions expressed in this song.  We've all gone through it in the past, and will likely go through it again in the future.  It's a rude awakening to realize that, even after you've found the love of your life, it doesn't guarantee that things will run smoothly, that you will indeed live "happily ever after" like all the fairy tales led you to believe when you were a child.  Rough patches come and go, but if the love is real, if it's worth fighting for, then you do whatever it takes to work it out, no matter how long it takes ... and no matter if the same problems seem to keep coming back to haunt you.

This song definitely rings true.  When you go through those hard times, sometimes it truly feels like the person you've been with for so long truly has become a stranger.   Photographs on the wall and home movies remind you of the good times, of all the smiles and laughter you've shared together. Then you look at each other and wonder "what in the world ever happened to that happy couple?  Where did they go?  How could two people who were so happy, so much in love, end up where they are?"  And most importantly, "can they ever find their way back?"

I've listened to this song a lot when I'm going through one of those rough patches with my hubby ... probably not a good idea, as it usually just serves to make me miserable, but I'm compelled to listen to it, nonetheless.  The one part that always makes me feel somewhat better is:

Got to do anything we got to do
Baby look at where we've been
We can build it up
We can tear it down
But we've got to start again

"We've got to start again" ... indeed. 

A truly excellent song, in my opinion, and yet another outstanding example of what a gifted songwriter Rick is.  It's a shame more people don't realize that.  I can say with absolute certainty that, even if I weren't such a big fan of Rick's, this song would still speak to me and touch my heart in many ways.  What an amazing talent this man has ... and how fortunate we are that he continues to share this gift with us all.

This sounded much like Stranger in the House from Tao.  Why repeat the theme? Here's my take:

(1)   Life's problems never really change. Same s**t, different day. Marriage especially is a state of flux. Just because we've worked out problem doesn't mean that problem will go away. (I like the Tao version much better, myself.)
(2)   Sahara Snow was an album written as an experiment. Writers are notorious for having notebooks full of ideas that were rejected or haven't been really formed yet. Rick might have been stumped with this tune, and have gone back to his notebooks (or tapes or whatever) and thought,
"hey, this was plan B for Stranger In The House, didn't really work for Tao (much too slow), maybe I could use it here" sort of reduce, reuse, recycle.
(3)   This has been in his idea repertoire since "What Would The Children Think." It's written from a different perspective, but the problem is the
same. A marriage in BIG trouble, a different solution to staying together — just duck your head and pretend, as opposed to the fight it out and go on with life.
(4)   Why ask why? How many different versions of boy meets girl, boy lusts after girl, boy gets girl can a person write? love songs are a dime a dozen. LIFE songs are priceless.

Two more things. in Stranger, this person knows exactly where to "hit" his tender spots. Violence doesn't bother him, but no sex and not being looked at really gets his goat. Pretty tough to deal with for a man who's spent most of his life in the spotlight.

Someone else pointed it out—whatever the problem is here that he is SOOOO willing to work out, was most likely caused by something HE did-- it's much easier to want to "work it out" when you're not the one who was hurt.  The more I think about it, the more Sahara Snow seems to be about contrasts. reality v. fantasy. case in point: "scandalous life" is a fantasy—whether it's his or ours or the   public-in-general's. "Stranger" is real life.  May or may not be not his real life, but it certainly hits home with a lot of us.

Life isn't love 'em and leave 'em weak knee-d, no strings attached.  It's about relationships and what it takes to make or break them.

Boy could this one come straight off of Tao or what?? Really reminds me of the kind of relationship turmoil on that album and reminds me a lot of "Stranger in the House". Even almost used that title as a line in the chorus. The first opening verse speaks of the break down in communication. Basically 'we can work this out, but we have to talk about it and talk it out so that the problems can be fixed if they can be'.

The relationship no longer feels like "home".  A place of love and safety and comfort. I don't think of the "house" in this case as a physical house in the building sense. To me the "house" is the relationship. Like the line "But if love isn't living here, this house will surely fall." If the love is gone the relationship crumbles.

Basically he is saying he will do anything to find the love again. They need to do whatever it takes to get there again. Almost kind of desperate. He is saying it is not going to be easy, there is going to be pain and sadness along the way, but the end result will be worth it.

I really take the verse that seems to talk of very physical part of the "fight" to build back the relationship to have double meaning. Obviously the first thing that jumps out at you is the actual physical "you can hit me, I can turn the other check." statement to me is saying, scream at me if you want, hit me if you want, just get it out in the open so we can work on the things that are breaking down the relationship. If that is what it takes he is saying bring it on.

I also look on that same verse as the "fighting" not being something physical, but emotional. Like the line "Got to open up and shed a little blood." It's not blood in the literal sense, but he is saying there are some very painful and hurtful things that need to be voiced and talked about. The force of those painful things almost like the force of a physical blow.

Then there are the lines "we can build it up, we can tear it down, but we've got to start again." They built this relationship and maybe they have to "destroy" a part of it with all of the painful stuff, but they can start over again and build it back up again to something loving and happy.

Okay, call me a realist but I love this song.  It's not your traditional love song but it's a realistic portrayal of some of the symptoms of a marriage breaking down.  You can almost visualize it as Rick describes it.  Lovers often get wrapped up in their problems and often things change within a relationship after the puppy love stage of love fades.  This song of course reminds me of Honeymoon In Beirut.  Both of these songs, I like to listen to when my own marriage takes a nasty dip.

On those occasions when things turn sour in my marriage, this song always makes me wish that it was my husband singing those words.  Unfortunately, Greg doesn't sing well.   LOL.  I'm sure that Rick and his wife have experienced their share of dips in their marriage.  I choose to believe that Rick wrote this song for her to bridge a chasm at some point in their relationship.  From time to time, a marriage will have a breakdown and if you want it to work, it's definitely worth the fight, emotionally of course. 

Tomorrow is my 15th Wedding Anniversary!!  :)  That's a lot of peaks.. and a few valleys. <wink!!> 

Hmm. . . this song sounds familiar.   Is it de ja vu? Oh - I know!  It's "Stranger in the House" from Tao!  The voice is a little raspier (and I LIKE that) but the sentiment's the same.  Makes me wonder what, exactly, is going on that 12 years apart, he's still singing the same song, so to speak.  Both songs reflect people that have been together a long time and have drifted apart.  They pass each other in the halls, things look familiar, but they're virtual strangers now, just sharing space.   He wants things to go back to the way they were.  Being married after many years takes work to keep it fresh (married 14 years myself, I KNOW this!) and he wants to do whatever he has to - "We can build it up; We can tear it down; But we've got to start again"  - to get the marriage back on track.

I hesitate to say this but it does seem I say this about a lot of Rick's songs... I think "Stranger"  is quite possibly my favorite from Sahara Snow.  I love Rick's "stranger" songs, most probably because I recognize my own marriage in them. Rick seems to describe my feelings so precisely, right down to the very telling line "sometimes I feel like a stranger in my house and I wonder who's lying with me".   Anyone who has been married for any length of time has felt this way at one time or another.

It's not only the lyrics that I love here, but the music and Rick's voice as well. The way he sings the very first line "Look at me, baby.....tell me what you see" both sensual and vulnerable, is enough to drive me over the edge.

I'm happy to know that Rick is willing to "tear it down and start again" to "do anything"  to make his marriage work. And believe me it IS work, as I'm sure most people know.  For ANY couple, much less a couple where the husband is regularly lusted after and sought out by the very contingent that supplies his family with it's livelihood, pretty ironic.  But he is a pro and seems to know how to balance and juggle both worlds. Apparently both he and the "little woman" understand their particular difficulties and are willing to fix whatever is broken, a rarity in today's divorce-happy, instant gratification,  self-indulgent world of celebrity relationships.  Bravo!! I applaud their persistence.

It never fails to amaze me, that Rick can share his deepest and most personal feelings with a "Stranger".

I love this song, as usual in a Rick song though, I'm wondering if a lot of this ultimatum he seems to be handing out doesn't have a lot to do with his favorite subject "sex"!l  In the first verse it seems to me he is saying, we've got to do something, anything, no matter what  "you can turn your head, I can wash my hands, but I've got to know where I stand" she's giving him the cold shoulder and he doesn't like it one bit, 'cause "I wonder who's lying with me". 
Sounds to me like she is withholding sex and he has had enough of it. He's tired of the cold shoulder and "cold bed", so he wants to get the screaming, fighting or whatever it would take to get back to what he considers his "normal life".

I do love the verse "We built this house of love, It was safe inside these walls" it is impressive that
he seems willing to do whatever it takes to try and mend the problem. But I wonder about the ulterior motives because I'd be willing to bet HE was the reason for the problem they are having in the first place.

My favorite part of this song is the opening--"Look at me baby, Tell me what you see--Am I the one you love, Or am I your enemy" and I also love the way his voice sounds on this whole song..too, too sexy.
Mr. Springthorpe seems to just reek of it.

I have kind of been dreading this one, because it makes me look at myself, which I don't always like to do.  A few years ago, I listened to this song and said, "how can this happen?"  Today, I say, "how did it happen?"  I do think this is about his own marriage.  I don't think a person can write so true to life unless it has happened to them, (but then again, I am sure that murder/mystery writers have not
committed a murder in order to write about it - at least I hope they have not.)  But, I still think this song is on a personal level.   

I truly admire the way he writes. He is able to just lay it on the table - warts and all - whether it is true or imagined, that is only for him to know.

The first thing that popped in my head was "Stranger in the House".  In both songs, there was a wonderful relationship that for whatever reason fell apart.  In Stranger in the House, he seemed to acknowledge the split and wonders what happened.  In Stranger he takes on a more proactive role and wants to work on it.  It is like a beginning and end of a story of a relationship.  It is one that you hope has the ending he is looking for, he is so determined to make it work.

I guess I'm in the minority when I admit that I don't really like this song.  I feel like it's unfinished.  I know that Sahara Snow is really sort of a collection of demos, but this is one I would have left off.  I liked the lyrics in "Stranger in the House" from Tao
better.  It could just be the music in this song that turns me off. I don't know.  It's one very few songs of Rick's that I don't really like. 

When I first heard this song it immediately struck me how similar it is to Stranger in the House so I couldn't help but compare it with that song all the time. I actually prefer Stranger as I prefer the music and I also like the lyrics better because Rick is showing a real willingness to do whatever it takes to work things out whereas in the earlier song they seemed to both be giving each other the cold shoulder and both be wondering whether to stay or leave. So to me Stranger seems much more positive.

Look at me baby
Tell me what you see
Am I the one you love
Or am I your enemy
You can turn your head
I can wash my hands
But I've got to know where I stand

It seems to be that it is she who is giving him the cold shoulder and barely speaking to him  but he has to find out where he stands and do whatever he can to build bridges and work things out.

Baby look at where we've been

I like that line as it is so meaningful when you've had a long time together with someone you don't want them to throw it all away by leaving.

And I swear if you'd just look at me
Then all those ghosts walking around the hallways
Will be something that used to be

I love these lines too. I like the way he uses 'ghosts' as the 'strangers' and  how if she'll just look at him and talk to him they can work everything out and the ghosts will disappear.

The earlier song on Tao wasn't one of my favorites but I definitely like this one. It is such an honest and realistic portrayal of a long relationship and the willingness to work at the marriage certainly shines through. It always feels to me that it is about Rick's own marriage, although it is co-written by Mark Spiro, I tend to think Rick probably wrote the words and perhaps Mark Spiro wrote the music or they collaborated on the music.